Images of her flash through my mind... The sweet baby... the darling toddler...
The caring sister, nurturing a sibling... The thoughtful reader... mini-seamstress... writer, artist and chef extraordinaire...
Now before me is a young, new wife and mom, asking how to make a rug and if the baby feels warm. We pass through aisles of a store together, taking turns carrying the baby while chatting about anything, everything and nothing at all.
And my heart is glad. My daughter is my friend.
A part of me longs to go back and hug her more... hold her when her heart broke... offer much more patience during very trying times. As many moms sometimes feel from time to time, I wish I could take a bit of the pain away... Most certainly I'd like to take back harshly spoken words.
Yet, I live in this moment. And it's a beautiful one that I cherish. For I rejoice that my daughter has made the ultimate decision. It's not a new one for her, but a continuing, developing decision to live for God.
My heart swells while I flood with emotion and I envision my girl on this path for years to come. It's not an easy path. She'll find that it's not easy to let go of pride and embrace humility. It's an outright war to try to tame your tongue. And life gets tough sometimes. Incredibly hard questions face us... Why me? Why this? Why him? How can I get through this? How can I face that?
But, she knows. She has a relationship with God. She seeks truth and doesn't have to answer each question. She will learn to let go and simply believe that a Sovereign God knows all and can be trusted.
A few weeks ago she and I were walking through a park. She had recently read a parenting book which really spoke to her and we were having quite a conversation.
I shared with her that I had my share of regrets as a parent, but that in the end, I hoped my children would know that I loved them very, very much and was sorry for my mistakes, but that I did the best that I could.
She stopped. She spoke. She said,
"Mom, don't say that to your children. Just say you're sorry. Jesus didn't die for, 'I did the best that I could', He died for our mistakes and sins."
Thank you, dear Heavenly Father for the gift of being a mom. Thank you for salvation and hope. Thank you.
I am so excited to serve God with my daughter.
3 John 1:4 "I have no greater joy that to hear that my children are walking in the truth."
Blessings!
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
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1 comment:
That was so beautiful Betty! You made me cry. Good tears:) Wonderfully spoken too.
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