Friday, December 31, 2010

Looking back and reaching forward

My thoughts are all over the place this morning.  I know that the day will be filled with thinking... reflecting... proposing... contemplating... planning.  I just cannot escape that.  By the end of the day there is no doubt that I will have written out some lists. 

And there go my thoughts again... I am suddenly in 8th grade sitting next to the most awesome childhood friend I ever had, Blenda Tagata.  We are in art class together and she is happily singing the Go-Go's Girl of 100 Lists.  Thanks, Blenda.  You put that song forever into my soul.  It's not really incredibly profound.  But, that is who I am, in part.  A girl of 100 lists.  

Back to today.   Well, not really.  Back in July I wrote about how my parents took me to church on New Year's Eve.  We would gather and the pastors would pass out paper.  Time was spent writing down what we were proud of during the year, what we were sorry for and would do differently and what we wanted to do in the coming year.  People moved about the pews, taking time to apologize to someone, if needed.  People knelt in prayer.  It started this lifelong habit. 

Recently we were invited to Scott's sister's home.  She had decorated and cooked up a meal for Scott's 40th birthday.  I had to work early in the day.  In preparation, I put on make-up.  I wanted to look beautiful next to my husband.  Each time our eyes met, I wanted him to be in love.  So, when I went to work, one of the office workers did a double take and commented on how great my make-up was.  That's the fun part about not wearing make-up all the time.  When you do, people look twice!  I giggled and told her what I am about to tell you.  Every end of the year I tell myself that I am going to wear make-up more often.  And by January 3rd, I am done.  Should make-up be part of this year's list?  Will this January be any different than Januarys past?

Here is my 2010 in review.  First, a handful of pictures that highlight the year.

Now... for the sentiments that accompany 2010.
It was the best of times.  It was the worst of times.  Actually, what I learned was to take the not so good times and live life to the fullest regardless.  This year was my life-living declaration.  Taking hold of every moment.  Finding beauty.  Finding purpose.  Living contentment.  Last week I read Savannah McQueen's thoughts on peace and had to stop and write down what she shared.  "And if my peace of mind is dependent on our behavior I would not be at peace."  (She has created a blog worth visiting each week,  ) Yeah, what she said.  Peace doesn't depend on how people behave.  Neither does contentment.  We have choices every day.  I choose every day to grasp hold of life... live... laugh... hug... look into my kids eyes... We only get one opportunity. 

Which leads me to my next quote by Mary Oliver, from The Summer Day,  "Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?"  Some days, in tough moments, that pulls me back up and gets me going again.  We have one life.  One day.  Each day is that one day that we have. 

2010 was a year where I went to battle with myself to overcome anger.  I won.  Well, while I love proclaiming that, it is a battle that doesn't give up or forever die.  But, I have learned so much.  Taking a breath.  Waiting.  Stopping myself in knee-jerk reactions.  Praying.  Holding my tongue.  Hey, the Bible talks about that.  It's the hardest thing to harness and try to control.  

Getting involved in a 4 semester Bible class at church was one of my best decisions.  From there, I made new friends who encourage and inspire me. 

Blogging became a much bigger part of my life in 2010.  I'm not the best at technology, but I have learned where to go and that I don't have to know, I just have to know who knows.  It has been great therapy to write about life.  Many posts have never been published because they were a bit too personal.  Many have.  I truly enjoy having a blog.

The year came to one terrific ending when Scott gave me my new camera.  That was a dream come true.  Ever since I had my first baby, I have wanted to learn about photography.  Now I am plodding my way through.  Bring on 2011!

Here are the things that I would like to do in 2011...

  • Compile my lists of books that I'd like to read.  Start reading through them!
  • Record, review and respond to prayer requests.
  • Wear make-up regularly.
  • Get to sleep earlier and drink just one cup of coffee each morning.
  • Watch my words.  
  • Wear make-up regularly.
  • Finish stitching a project that I began 4 years ago... it's a very big project.
  • Exercise regularly!  Take my supplements!
  • Wear make-up regularly.
  • Work through Martha Stewart's Homekeeping Handbook, writing about it at Tackle a Task.
  • Create "Five Fat Files" for 1. Spiritual growth  2. Marriage  3. Photography  4. Teen parenting/college prep  5. Homemaking.
  • Wear make-up regularly.
Oops, I forgot to cross off that bottom one.  I suppose I'll leave it that way for laughs... along with my goal of caring about being stylish.  Yeah, that'll work.  ;)  (This girl loves her blue jeans...)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I liked your quote ;)